Quicksand

18 Nov

I was talking to some friends yesterday about some pressure I’ve got in my love life (if you can call it a love life- ‘clusterfuck’ might be a more appropriate term, given its recent dramatic nature).

None of them know about my drinking issues yet or my commitment to sobriety, but they started discussing something very relevant to it.

They were talking about the importance of me continuing to build up the different pillars of my life again which have been eroded by the break up of my 7 year relationship this year, my struggle to get back to a healthy weight after years of disordered eating (thanks, drinking, for piling on those pounds…) and get my confidence back.

They were talking about how far I’d come this year in my career, my confidence and my running. They were worried that if I threw a new relationship into the mix it would “topple my pillars.” They’re right.

Apologies this blog is getting into crude metaphor territory AGAIN, but it helps me to get my head round this first period of sobriety by making comparisons, so here goes:

One of the things drinking has done is to build those pillars on a foundation of quicksand. Everything I’ve built up, drinking has eroded a little.

Already I feel stronger and more stable to keep building. I’ve got a nagging feeling that this sobriety lark might well be the most important thing I ever do, so all the more reason to stick to it.

Happy Monday!

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2 Responses to “Quicksand”

  1. momma bee November 18, 2013 at 1:00 pm #

    I feel the same way… Right now sobriety is the only thing that matters. It was what made my life go so negative the last few years. The longer I’m sober, the other important things like diet, exercise, relationships and my confidence will start to turn positive too.

    We can do this!

  2. FitFatFood November 18, 2013 at 1:51 pm #

    We can indeed Momma Bee! You’re a bit further ahead than me in the 100 day challenge (I’m only on day 8!) but keeping on our toes is crucial whatever stage we’re at. That wolfie is always out to bite us!

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