Clubbing Sober

5 May

Early sobriety is full of firsts and there were few I’ve been more nervous about than going clubbing. 

I’ve done endless work events, nights in pubs and bars and even danced at a wedding but I hadn’t yet gone out clubbing until last night. 

I love dancing and really needed to let my hair down so when someone suggested a Bank Holiday evening out I jumped at the chance. By the time the day actually came to go, I didn’t want to. The thought of heading out at 11pm was unbearable. But I prepared as best I could- I slept in the day before, had good nutritious food and my new Sober Saviour for getting through long events: Zero Calorie Red Bull. 

As with every other sober first, it was a fascinating experience. 

Here’s what I learnt (I’m quite into my lists of sober lessons at the moment!):

It’s all about the company and the music- if either one of these isn’t spot on, the night can be uncomfortable or boring. But when the two come together perfectly, it’s a joy. 

Drink only slightly heightens the experience- the ‘sweet spot’ of drinking I once had where I wasn’t smashed but had enough of a buzz to really get high on the music was fantastic while it lasted. But it’s been a few years since I’ve been able to control my drinking and get that. Last night, I got the same surges of joy from the music and flashing lights without the consequences of downing vodka. 

Drinking is a waste– I watched my friends get wasted, and some of them went off to do coke, which I was pretty shocked by. Those who took the drugs were completely out of it. They just floated around the dance floor, barely engaged with what was going on. 

Being sober is the best money saver ever!- I sort of knew this already, but last night I spent SIX POUNDS. SIX ENGLISH POUNDS. I got a night bus home because I was in a fit state to keep myself safe and paid for the cloakroom and some sparkling water. Amazing. I treated myself to a gorgeous pair of £50 boots this morning- I would have spent much more on a night out. 

Hangovers aren’t just caused by drinking– I was out til 4am and this morning I’m REALLY feeling it. The lack of sleep has got to me, but it was so worth it. Because I’m not hungover too, I went out and blasted a workout to perk myself up and then will get an early night tonight. When I was drinking I probably would have had a drink at 4pm to get me through the day and ended up finishing the bottle and starting the hangover cycle all over again. 

If you want to leave, get out of there– I knew that if at any point I left, my wasted friends would notice but not care. They were too wrapped up in their own drunk/high thing. That was a really comforting thought when heading out- I knew I could leave at any time I wanted, especially if I fancied drinking. As it turned out, I stayed to the bitter end because I was having so much fun. Happy days. 

Being sober helps me squeeze every moment out of life– Yesterday I went to 3 social things before clubbing. Had I been drinking I’d have started at 4pm and not stopped for another 12 hours. Instead of a blurry day, I had a wonderful one full of clarity. 

I was talking to my sponsor about how great sobriety feels at the moment and she said something that EXACTLY describes how I’m feel ing at the moment:

‘I think as time goes on, and we stay sober, it becomes a precious thing that you feel inwardly proud and quite protective of. It’s all part of the long term sobriety where you actually want to be sober instead of not wanting to be an alcoholic.’

I love this thought. It really hits the nail on the head of the shift from ‘WHY ME???’ to ‘HURRAH SOBRIETY!’ 

Long may it last. 

 

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15 Responses to “Clubbing Sober”

  1. Binki (sobernoodles) May 5, 2014 at 12:12 pm #

    Excellent post, remember the old clubbing days so well, always looking for the next drink and hating the 11pm pub and 2am club finish – although nowadays of course people can keep going 24/7. xxx

    • FitFatFood May 6, 2014 at 9:31 am #

      Thanks Binki- and yes, people were still out partying when I left at nearly 4am!

  2. pumpkinwaffle121 May 5, 2014 at 1:10 pm #

    I love the part about the hangovers! Anytime I’m out late sober I am definitely feeling it the next day. I’m always thankful that it isn’t nearly as bad as if I had indulged in a drink or 12!

  3. girlonthelearn May 5, 2014 at 3:57 pm #

    So awesome! Love this list of positive things from going out sober. Motivates me to believe that I am not giving up on having fun for the rest of my life. 🙂

    • FitFatFood May 6, 2014 at 9:30 am #

      Definitely not- it just takes time to build up our sober muscle to know how to deal with these things x x x

  4. lucy2610 May 5, 2014 at 4:50 pm #

    I’d be right up for it too if I wasn’t a bit wary of red bull. How was your experience on it Go you FFF! 🙂 PS Maybe see you next Sat night 😉 xx

    • FitFatFood May 8, 2014 at 12:36 pm #

      Indeed!

      I had one red bull and certainly wouldn’t have any more! It gave me an energy lift, but iI dread to think what’s in it!

  5. Lilly May 5, 2014 at 10:54 pm #

    Was wondering how you are doing so this is great to read! You are braver than me. I bowed out of a clubbing night on the weekend – didn’t even consider it actually – because I knew it would be a heavy drinking/drugging night for my friends and I just couldn’t go there. And, frankly, I don’t think I would have enjoyed it sober with my friends so trashed and not a club scene I’m really into anyway. I had major FOMO anyway but then, when I heard about what a huge night it was, and thought about how I’d feel after a night like that and how it would spiral me backwards, I was glad I was ‘boring’ and in bed by 11pm (and up doing yoga the next morning early) instead. But some day maybe I can enjoy nights like that more sober. In any case, HOORAY! XX

    • FitFatFood May 8, 2014 at 12:37 pm #

      AHHHHHH FOMO. The bugger.

      Some nights it’s better just not to go, I think. I’ve bowed out of lots of nights because I didn’t quite feel right, but I knew this one was the right one for me to go to.

      Hope you’re still doing we’ll x x x

  6. primrosep May 6, 2014 at 5:11 am #

    if I ever get an award it would be Middleaged Person Least Likely To Go Clubbing but that doesn’t stop me being highly gleeful for you at reading this post! you planned ahead, had a great time, noticed your reactions and made sure the night went well for you. you did make me snort at you only spending six of our English pounds! and now you have a great pair of sober boots! well done young lady…off to polish my zimmer frame 😉 xxx

    • FitFatFood May 6, 2014 at 9:30 am #

      HA! Really made me giggle with this.

      Not all nights will be like this but it was great to know that I can still get out there and do it

  7. soberjournalist May 6, 2014 at 2:50 pm #

    What a lovely post, very insightful indeed. I agree about the shift. I think this just happens, at some point, without us really noticing… You really need that for long term sobriety – you need to be proud and protective of your sobriety! What you said about chasing that sweet spot also rang a few bells. I was always hankering after that perfect buzz… But the more I drank the harder it was to achieve. I always drank too much, (but was always convinced I wouldn’t) and hurtled straight into plain drunk mode. Not good!

    • FitFatFood May 8, 2014 at 12:35 pm #

      The perfect buzz doesn’t exist after the switch has been flipped I reckon…

  8. Catherine February 22, 2017 at 2:25 pm #

    Hello, I’m going for my first sober clubbing experience and am also really nervous about it, so this post helped me loads! thank you 🙂

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